Awww. Poor David. That must of hurt.
Posted by Classified Info on August 08, 2008 | Reply
I sliced off the tip of my left-hand middle-finger. It hurts pretty bad, and hasn't stopped bleeding for hours. I've bundled it up tightly with gauze and bandages in hopes it will clot overnight. If it doesn't, I have a series of very interesting flights ahead of me in the morning.
The good news is that I got all the orders out before I maimed myself. I can't express in mere words how happy that makes me, because there were several times I didn't think it would ever end.
The bad news is that I can no longer do a double flip-off since one of my flipping fingers out of commission.
UPDATE: w00t! I wadded enough gauze around my finger to choke a horse, and was much relieved to wake up after my 4-hour "nap" to see that nothing leaked out. After carefully (and painfully) unwrapping things, I was able to cut around the part that clotted, saturate it with antibiotics, and put a Band-Aid brand adhesive bandage strip (or three) to cover it. Hopefully I can clean it up and not have to go to the doctor in Chicago.
Even better, my ability to double-flip-off people who annoy me is now restored.
*Gasps in horror at the mental image of a tipless, copiously bleeding middle finger.*
Jeez Dave, did your eye even have time to heal before you injured yourself again?
Sounds like you're paying off some Karma. Sending good thoughts and fast-healing wishes your way.
Posted by carlos m. hernandez on August 08, 2008 | Reply
I can not believe you are acting like every other co-dependent, douche bag, enabler, dude! There you are, physically maimed and disfigured and still trying to cover up for that abusive asshole monkey of yours! Dave, it's time to wake up and face the truth. Monkeys that really love you do not buy weapons of mass destruction to use on the people they care about.
Dave I am only saying this because I feel we have bonded in a special, personal way. I know I am putting my life at monkey-risk by saying this, but it has to be said. That homicidal nutcase monkey is out of control! You need to call one of the councilors at the battered pet owners domestic shelter. Making that call is the hardest part getting your life back under control.
Oh... and just in case the Monkey reads your comments.. I think I will use the pen name
- Adam Heath
Posted by notY2K Survivor on August 08, 2008 | Reply
Did you ice it?
If you are still "bleeding" in the morning, that's not good. I stay away from the local docs BUT bleeding for too long is even worse so go to a doc if it hasn't stopped.
Posted by awytch on August 08, 2008 | Reply
You've really been having a bad few weeks haven't you? Your back, your eyes, your finger...what's next??
Posted by Princess of the Universe on August 08, 2008 | Reply
Ooh, I love a bit of blood and gore. Post a pic of your decapitated finger please!
Posted by serap on August 08, 2008 | Reply
Dave dude,
I've been following you for just about a year. (I remember 'cause you were shipping boxes and had just done a face-plant coming down the stairs or something). Anyway, since then, it seems like you've sliced your fingers minimum 4 or 5 times. I think we're going to have to chip in and buy you some of those chain-mail gloves like they use on Shark Week or you're going to end up like the Martin Balsam character in "Little Big Man". Every few years when Dustin Hoffman's character would come across him, again, him he'd be missing another appendage, eye, etc. We need you in one piece. OK?
Posted by ETinNY on August 08, 2008 | Reply
I did this very thing a few months ago. Hurt like a motherfucker. Took forever to heal, and it's still not quite right (i.e.there's a distinct lopped-off side, and the cut end has different nerve sensations, but whatev). I hope yours does better. Gah, you've brought all the horror right back to me!
P.S. I blame my accident on Top Chef. You?
I had a dream last night about getting my dave2 stuff in the mail.
I cut off the tip of my finger once playing with scissors. No matter how hard we looked, we could not find the tip, and so I told my brother - he was about 10, that my finger tip (the part that was cut off and now lost) was a zombie and in the darkest part of the night, it was going to get him.
Did you threaten anyone with your tipless finger?
Posted by bluepaintred on August 08, 2008 | Reply
Ouch, ouch, ouch! If only we could get Bones from Star Trek to use one of his fancy devices to heal you!
Posted by Atomic Bombshell on August 08, 2008 | Reply
now you can double-flip-off people who mess up your burrito order
Posted by joy on August 08, 2008 | Reply
Wow. The "fuck people up physically" gods are really pissed with you, aren't they? Man.
I can relate to the finger wound, though. I was slicing cukes up for the kids last year and took the tip off my left index finger. Lots of "FUCKS!" that afternoon.
Posted by Coal Miner's Granddaughter on August 08, 2008 | Reply
Ouch. Good lord sir, be careful. I just got the willies reading about your accident. When I was a wee nipper, I decided to do the same thing to my thumb with a scythe. Good times.
Posted by Kevin Spencer on August 08, 2008 | Reply
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