Eagle

I think most everyone has experienced a time when they feel very small and alone.

The last time I remember truly feeling that way was in the 1990's when I was doing a lot of traveling by myself. Nothing makes you feel more small and alone than wandering in a strange country where you don't speak the language and don't really know what you're doing. Many times it was just me, my backpack, a map, and very little money.

It was a different time. Blogging hadn't quite arrived. Social networking as we know it now didn't exist. Sure the internet was around, but it wasn't something you carried around in your pocket like today. The way I can best describe life back then is disconnected.

Now I'm never alone. Not really.

Even when I'm alone.

Thanks to the internet, I have friends around the world. Somebody I know somewhere is online at any given time and all it takes is a Tweet or a Facebook update to reach them. I'm hardly ever disconnected... even when I'm traveling in foreign lands far from home. I just pull out my iPhone and the entire world is at my fingertips.

Feeling "alone" for me now-a-days has radically changed.

It's no longer so much about me so much as it's about things around me.

Last year a movie came out called The Eagle. It was roundly savaged in the reviews. People really disliked the film. This was disappointing to me because I'm a fan of Roman Empire era books and movies and was looking forward to it. But I ended up skipping it. Who has time for bad movies?

Tonight I wanted some background noise while working so I turned on the television. As I was whipping through channel after channel of nothing, I saw that HBO had The Eagle playing, so I left it there and went back to work. At least I wouldn't be distracted.

But slowly the movie sucked me in. I ended up really liking it.

And knowing that so many people hated it suddenly made me feel very alone.

I just didn't get it. Yes, the story was simple and straightforward, but it's well-crafted. It's beautifully shot. Good and evil aren't spelled out in black & white, but are subjective and interesting. The film is entertaining overall and even a bit touching in places. So... what's the problem? In an effort to understand what I had missed that was so loathsome, I started reading the bad reviews. I didn't agree with much of them.

A big deal was made over how Romans were played by Americans speaking English where the Brits were played by actual Brits speaking Gaelic. I guess it's odd, but it had an internal logic that was consistent, so I wasn't bothered. Many reviews criticized Channing Tatum's performance as "uninspiring." This was puzzling to me. His character at its core was disgraced, and dejected, and I think that came across. Maybe he could have been a little more passionate as his quest came to a head, but even then I though his emotional detachment worked in the context of the character...

Tatum plays Marcus Flavius Aquila, a Roman Centurian whose father disappeared with the famous Ninth Legion in the wilds of Scotland, taking the the famed Eagle Standard (a symbol of Rome) with them. Aquila chooses to be posted in Britain in the hopes that he can regain his family honor there. But his military career is cut short when he is badly wounded by a hoard of invading Celts. While recovering, he hears rumors that the Eagle Standard has been seen in the North. The film then becomes a buddy flick as Aquila and his British slave Escra (Jamie Bell) go on a quest to recover The Eagle so Aquila's family name can be cleared. Some fighting and an encounter with "Seal People" ensue...

So I liked the movie and I'm pretty much alone in that.

Oh well.

Maybe I can commiserate with fans of the television show Chuck which aired its last episode tonight because not very many people liked it*.

Being alone together makes being alone not so bad!

*Including me. I frickin' hated the show Chuck. The only thing that could get me to watch an episode would be if the whiny little bitch Chuck Bartowski was killed in some horribly gruesome manner.

Moonbase

Newt Gingrich is a moron and let me tell you why.

At a campaign stop at Florida's Space Coast, he promised that there will be a permanent American lunar colony within eight years if he is elected president. As if that weren't bad enough, people seem to be crazy in love with the idea.

Putting aside where we're going to get the money to pay for all this when taxes are going to be cut to the bone under a Gingrich presidency, I have to say that this is one of the stupidest ideas I have ever heard.

HAVE WE LEARNED NOTHING FROM SPACE:1999?!?

For those not in the know, SPACE: 1999 was a 1970's science fiction show that told the cautionary tale of what happens when you build a lunar colony on the moon.

In the series, the founding of Moonbase Alpha leads to earth storing their nuclear waste on the far side of the moon. One day, a strange magnetic radiation causes the waste to go into meltdown and a massive thermonuclear explosion ensues...

And do you know what happens next?

Do you?

THE MOON IS BLASTED OUT OF EARTH ORBIT AND HURLED INTO SPACE, that's what!

Never mind that having our moon gone missing would be devastating for all life on earth because of it fucking up the weather and tides and stuff... that's not even the worst part. No, the worst part is that the humans stuck on the moon will eventually encounter freaky-ass space monsters... freaky-ass space bitches... AND freaky-ass space bitches that turn into freaky-ass space monsters!

And there you have it. Vote for Newt Gingrich if you must, but only if you want to lose our moon and have American citizens face space bitches that turn into space monsters (which, admittedly, would be a terrific candidate for the fourth Mrs. Gingrich... COINCIDENCE?!?).

As for me? I choose to REMEMBER MOONBASE ALPHA! SAY NO LUNAR COLONIZATION! SAY NO TO NEWT GINGRICH!

It's at times like these that I truly fear for this country. Spread the word. Save us all.

Plowed

When you wake up to the sound of snowplows scraping the street, it's more difficult than usual to get out of bed. Obviously it snowed last night, could still be snowing, and that means the roads are going to suck.

Except it turns out it wasn't snow, it was rain. Which was freezing over the snow and ended up creating an icy crust all over the roads... and my car. This made driving to work a bit of an ordeal because everybody was sliding on shards of ice...

Tonight it's snowing again, so tomorrow there will be snow on ice on snow.

That's something to look forward to.

   
In other news, I've put my good-bye letter to BlackBerry and RIM in an extended entry...

→ Click here to continue reading "Plowed"...

Sewing Tuesday 1

My online sewing classes have started!

I learned to sew when I was pretty young. My grandmother thought it was important that I be able to mend a hole in a shirt or hem a pair of pants, so she taught me the basics. Over the years I've made use of my sewing skills from time to time. Usually to fix a piece of clothing I've ripped up, but sometimes to do something interesting. Like make a Halloween costume...

But I've grown rusty over the years, and the last thing I want to do is embarrass myself in front of my grandmother the next time I have to use her sewing machine.

And sew (heh heh) I signed up for an e-course over at Whipstitch Modern Sewing called "Essential Sewing." It sounded like exactly what I needed to get my confidence back and hone my skills for whatever sewing-related emergencies might come up. The itinerary is surprisingly comprehensive, and takes six weeks to complete (all for the ridiculous bargain price of $179!).

The e-course started with an intro video yesterday.

It's nothing like I thought it would be.

It's actually fun.

That's because Deborah isn't content to just throw out instructions, her videos are all about getting everybody excited about sewing. And she's funny...

NOTE: Deborah doesn't actually say this. I'm paraphrasing.

Students started out by introducing ourselves, talking about our sewing experience, then telling everybody our "sewing fantasy"... what we aspire to do once we've completed the course. My fantasy is to be able to neatly extend sleeves on shirts and jackets when I can't find them in "Tall" sizes (which is all the time). Fingers crossed that Deb will make all my fantasies come true!*

Tonight was the second video where Deborah starts digging into the tools you'll need. Like scissors...

NOTE: Deborah doesn't actually say this. I'm paraphrasing again.

Apparently, when it comes to scissors, ideally you want eight long hard inches of steel. I was kind of embarrassed when I had to tell everybody in the class that I'm packin' two inches of soft aluminum... with pink plastic handles...

What I didn't have the guts to share is that my grandmother's sewing machine is like... sixty years old or something. Oh well. It totally works...

   
From there we went on to learning about irons...

NOTE: Deborah doesn't actually say this. She SHOULD though, right?

Oh yeah!

When I signed up for the class, I was excited about becoming a better seamstress seamster(?), but kind of dreading having to do the work to actually get there. But now? After only two videos, I am completely psyched to dig in and learn to sew stuff good!

I've decided to post my progress on Tuesday of each week. THAT aught to be interesting.

In the meanwhile, if you want to join in on the class (or take a look at the classes offered for all experience levels)... click here to visit the Whipstitch e-course page! Then prepare to have your world rocked**.

*I'd be dubious, but she wouldn't be the first woman putting videos on the internet that have promised to make my fantasies come true, then delivered on that promise!

**Or at least nicely tailored.

Dragon

What a freaky-ass day.

I can only guess that this has something to do with the Chinese New Year beginning. It's The Year of the Dragon, after all. And while I don't put much stock into the Chinese Zodiac, I do think it's a pretty entertaining and well-thought-out concept. Especially since Dragons have Rats and Monkeys as bestest friends, which is kind of cool if you ask me...

My day started when I went to get into my car and drive to work. And found that I couldn't. There was a sheet of ice a quarter-inch thick covering everything... including the door. This meant fifteen minutes of scraping ice out of the door seams with the bottle opener on my keychain. Then another ten minutes chipping ice off the rest of my car with an ice scraper before my vehicle was fit to drive. It wouldn't have been all that bad if not for the fact that my bottle opener broke, giving up its life so I could go to work. I've had it for over a decade and used it often, but don't think I ever actually opened a bottle with it.

Once I finally made it to work, I was plagued with a series of inexplicably bizarre phone calls (and here I was just saying how much I hated talking on the phone!). The bad news is that it wasted entirely too much of my time. The good news is that I got to alleviate my boredom by getting caught up on Facebook and Twitter.

I also got caught up with entertainment news and learned that Seal and Heidi Klum were breaking up their marriage after seven years. I dunno why, but I was pretty sad to hear it.

And speaking of marriage... I then got caught up on news news and learned that Washington State's Legislature has enough votes to pass marriage equality. Whether this actually happens remains to be seen, but I am really happy that my gay and lesbian friends here in The Evergreen State are one step closer to being able to celebrate their relationships in marriage just like opposite-sex couples can!

Of course, all is not big gay smiles here in The Pacific Northwest...

This is Pastor Ken Hutcherson who is heading up some backwards anti-equality organization had this to say about Washington State Governor Chris Gregoire... "She might as well change her name to John Wilkes Booth because what she’s doing now is trying to put a bullet in the head of one of the greatest traditions that has ever existed and has built our society, and that is marriage between one man and one woman."

Far be it for me to speak ill of a man of the cloth... but what a fucking idiot.

What "puts a bullet in the head of marriage" is DIVORCE you dumbass. And why drag President Lincoln into this? Perhaps you hadn't heard, but the man eventually ended up fighting for equality of peoples in kind of a big way. Not really the best example you could have used.

But whatever.

What's important is that dinosaurs like Pastor Ken are slowly and steadily becoming a thing of the past as new generations of Americans understand that FREEDOM means that you sometimes have to accept shit you don't want to. Don't believe in same-sex marriage? Then how about you don't fucking marry somebody of the same sex?

But I guess I should know better than to try and apply logic to situations like these. To entirely too many people, it's only "freedom" when everything goes your way.

Bullet Sunday 264

THE SNOWPOCALYPSE IS UPON US! SNOWMAGEDDON IS HERE! Grab that special someone and bundle up tight, because Bullet Sunday starts now...

   
• Depp! People can say what they like, but nobody in cinema amazes me like Johnny Depp. The guy is absolutely talented... absolutely fearless... and absolutely brilliant. He can disappear into a role unlike anybody else, and owns any character he takes on. And this time it's yet another Tim Burton collaboration where he will be playing Barnabas Collins in the movie adaptation of Dark Shadows. This one image that's been released is enough to make me want to see this movie...

Just like it only took one image for me to want to see these movies...

I'll be the first to admit that not every film Johnny Depp signs onto ends up being great. But his performances are always interesting. It's hard to ask for anything more than that, so I'm always looking forward to his next performance.

   
• Sniffle! I tend to look at everything as a learning experience. Even having a cold. This time around I learned about a new tissue... COOL TOUCH KLEENEX...

It is awesome on a sore nose because it is, in fact, cool to the touch. And it feels great on your nose. I think it must be some kind of scent-free menthol-like substance that is body-heat activated. Or not. But however they make it happen, it's a pretty sweet advance in tissue technology, and the only tissue I'll be buying from now on.

   
• Must-See TV! I have to say, I am loving the new FOX television series The Finder, and that was totally unexpected given that it's a spin-off of Bones, which is a show I can't stand...

I could tell you what a terrific, quirky character Walter "The Finder" Sherman is (played by Geoff Stults) and how entertaining the stories are, but all I really need to say is that it has Michael Clarke Duncan in it. If you're looking for something a little different to watch this winter, this show may be worth a look. You can catch the last couple episodes streaming on the official FOX site.

   
• Netflix Streaming Movie of the Month! Lately I've been on a foreign movie binge and discovering some real gems. The latest is a wonderful French film called The Grocer's Son now streaming on Netflix...

After his father has a heart attack, a guy living in Paris returns to his family home in the countryside to help his mother with their store. His job is to drive a grocery van to small villages and remote homes so that the elderly people there can buy foodstuffs. After a while he begins to form a bond with his customers and his outlook on life starts to change. If you're looking for some "comfort cinema" this sweet story is worth watching.

   
• Netflix Streaming TV Series of the Month! The contemporary re-imagining of Sherlock Holmes by Steven Moffat and the BBC is currently streaming on Netflix. It is beyond brilliant, and I highly recommend giving it a look if you haven't already...

Like most shows from across the pond, Sherlock has stories, acting, and production values that are leagues above what typically passes for American television. Probably because each series only has three episodes. They put all their good ideas into small number of shows rather than trying to stretch everything out over 22 episodes like they do here.

   
• Cinematic Anticipation! There's been a movie hovering on the horizon that has me pretty excited. Now Robot and Frank has been unleashed at Sundance and the reviews have been pretty great...

I mean, come on, it's got Frank Langella playing a retired cat burglar who is given a robot to help around the house. But Frank discovers a much more interesting use for his robot pal... crime. As a premise, it doesn't get much better than that!

   
Annnnnd... scene. I need toast and jam.

Elevens

Last night as my cold was ending and my sinuses were draining out, I was aching too much to sleep. Instead I wrote today's blog post. This morning I went to read it and couldn't understand what in the heck I was talking about. At first I was going to try and edit it into something cohesive, but decided to delete it instead.

Luckily Kim came along with a meme to blog about this fine Saturday (which Marty also did). It's ELEVEN RANDOM THINGS ABOUT YOU!

1. I don't drink coffee. I've tried it maybe two or three times and really, really don't like it.
2. Even though I don't have any kids, I am very protective of them. Any time I spot a kid in trouble it's pretty much guaranteed I'll do whatever I can to help. This is the sole motivating factor in my loathing of Rick "Piece of Shit" Santorum as a presidential candidate. His hate-filled rhetoric about homosexuals creates an environment where gay kids are ruthlessly persecuted for something they can't do anything about. The fact that this sometimes leads to them getting killed or causes them to commit suicide has me convinced that Santorum (and people like him) are an accessory to murder.
   UPDATE: Today there's another tragic victim of the society that monsters like Rick "Piece of Shit" Santorum are building. This is what their perverted vision of God wants for His people?
3. When I was a kid, I had to take allergy shots three times a week. I was allergic to all kinds of odd things including dirt, wet cement, and my own body. Luckily, I outgrew my allergies... unluckily they were replaced with something much worse.
4. I am a fan of watching Magic: The Gathering tournaments. Not only did I attend local tournaments from time to time, but I used to watch the televised championships on ESPN back in the day. As if that weren't enough, I still watch Magic tournament videos on YouTube every once in a while. The odd part? I have never played a single game myself. Back when it was popular, I couldn't afford the good cards. Now-a-days, nobody I know plays it.
5. Because of my Magic: The Gathering addiction, I'm a fan of Jon Finkel, who is one of the greatest players of the game ever and a World Champion. Back on August 29th of last year, a woman went on a date with the guy and wrote an article ridiculing him once she found who he is. I didn't read the story until a friend told me about it three days later on September 1st. It upset me so badly that this woman could be such a heartless bitch to somebody I admire that it put me in very bad mood. Indeed, it kind of explains the tone of my blog entry the next day.
6. I can't stand the Harry Potter books or movies. Because so many of my friends like them, I have attempted to read/watch them many times without success. Sorry, but they just suck. This has not, I might add, deterred me from wanting to visit The Wizarding World of Harry Potter at Universal Studios Florida... nor has it deterred me from playing the LEGO Harry Potter video games (which I love).
7. I still own a VHS videotape player. There's a few shows I own on videocassette that I can't find on any modern format... I may want to watch them one day.
8. I dislike talking on the telephone so much that I'll often go to great lengths to avoid it. On more than one occasion I've driven for hours to see somebody in person rather than to have to talk to them on the phone.
9. I used to love cooking and regularly made much of the stuff I eat from scratch. Sometime over the last ten years that all changed and now I can't stand the idea of cooking anything. Yeah, I'll fry up a veggie burger or make a sandwich, but anything more ambitious than that only happens once or twice a month. I really need to start eating healthier, so hopefully this will change.
10. I own nearly a hundred travel books, many of which were bought after I visited the place they were written for. I find travel books to be a great souvenir for revisiting where you've been... especially the DK Eyewitness Guides with all those nifty photos.
11. I am growing increasingly obsessed with the idea of visiting Antarctica. Along with India, it's one of those places I mean to see before I die. Every time I read a new story of how the ice covering on the continent is breaking apart, I worry that it will be destroyed before I can make it there.

And now I'm answering Kim's Eleven questions...

1. What is your dream job? Travel reviewer.
2. What is the farthest (furthest?) you have traveled from home? I'm guessing that would be Uluru, Australia.
3. Do you think you can you have more than one best friend? Sure.
4. What is your favorite cuisine? Italian
5. Who is the first person you want to share news with? Depends on what kind of news it is?
6. What are people likely to ask you to help them with? To design something, probably.
7. What are you likely to ask someone to help you with? Ironing.
8. Why do you read blogs? To keep up with interesting people and make new friends.
9. Who knows you the best? My sister.
10. Do you believe in karma? Yes. Yes I do.
11. What's something you are really interested in, that most people don't know about? (that you are interested in it, not the thing itself) Woodworking.

I think I'm supposed to ask eleven questions of my own now, but I'm wiped out. Kim has good questions... answer hers!