To the owner's credit, he does have the sense to turn it off when it's light outside. (Not that I'm taking sides.)
Or, it that a deceptively light photo?
As I left for work this morning, the adorable old couple that lives next door were screaming at each other. Again. This time over how to dispose of eggshells properly. I can't help but feel that one of these days I'm going to see CSI over there picking up body parts, because these bitches will fight over anything.
I mean, eggshells? Really?
And now, before I forget, here is the latest meme creeping through the blogosphere (thanks Hilly and Jenny!)... a personal slogan generator!
| Your Slogan Should Be |
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Yeah, baby! Like that's not embarrassing.
Every morning I have my choice of four routes to work. Which route I take depends on a number of factors which are balanced in my head until the least offensive route is determined. For example, if there's a train rolling through town, I'll take the Goodwin Bridge to the highway because its the only route that has an overpass.
Of all the ways I can get to work, the one that bothers me the most is the Pioneer Avenue route. Not only because it's a continuous school zone that enforces a 20mph speed limit, but because there's a sight along the way which bugs the crap out of me. Take a look at this...
Yes, it's a yard light. And there's nothing wrong with a yard light... plenty of people have them... the problem is this...
WTF? Why would you put a single yard light directly next to a street light? What purpose does it serve? It's not even located by a walkway going to the house! So why? What's it doing there? And if you simply MUST double-light that section of your yard, why would you make a mini version of the street light next to it? Why? Why? Why? Is it supposed to be some kind of optical illusion or something?
Every time I drive past that stupid light, I start freaking out.
And this morning I have to drive this route while I'm already freaking out because one of my neighbors is probably laying dead in my driveway with eggshells scattered over their corpse.
The stress of living in a small town is really starting to wear on me. I need to move to the relative sanity you find in a big city.
"Jake Titus, first man, then machine." Dave you got me all pumped up! It makes me want to knock down street lights with my car!
Posted by jake titus on April 17, 2008 | Reply
Haha! That photo made me laugh out loud. I would not be able to keep my eyes off that light either. It is a little creepy and funny at the same time.
You should caption it. "When I grow up, I'm going to be a real street light!"
By the way, why are the other lights still on when it's day? Do they not switch them off during the day?
Posted by Colin Brooks on April 17, 2008 | Reply
"Dsilkotch. What's The Worst That Could Happen?"
I laughed a bit too hard at this. Okay, so it's been a rough month...
Posted by Debora Silkotch on April 17, 2008 | Reply
OMG! Bust a gut. I feel you, Debora. This was hilarious.
Posted by Brent Vermilyea on April 18, 2008 | Reply
eggshells? really? thanks for the reminder to NEVER get married. sheesh.
you can come live in pittsburgh. i'll be gentle.
love your slogan...mine is "Once You Go Becky. You’ll Never Go Back."
Posted by hello haha narf on April 18, 2008 | Reply
"Do you have Dave Inside"
That's what she said... he he... (i know, juvenile comment, but it's what came to me when reading that).
This morning's slogan for me is:
"Marty. Hand-built by Robots." Sweet. I hope I'm related to Bender somehow.
Posted by ChillyWilly on April 18, 2008 | Reply
I can honestly say "NO" as a reply to your slogan... Err I think... yeah... pretty sure.. ish...
My slogan turned out to be:
Once you go DutchBitch, you never go back!
Heh...
Posted by DutchBitch on April 18, 2008 | Reply
Delmer... I don't think he ever turns the light on... even at night. It's entirely possible that it is exclusively decorative, with no light inside?
Janna... I recoiled in horror at mine, but decided to keep it in case things got worse!
Mik... That could be what they were screaming about. It's hard to tell with them sometimes.
Winter... Apparently Martians have good taste!
Lewis... I have plenty of meds left over from my kidney stone, perhaps I should start taking them?
Suze... Well, at least yours had the benefit of making it sound as if it were a good thing with the smiling and all!
Shiny... Even an explanation like that would be preferable to the stuff that goes through my head each time I drive by.
Amanda... I would have a harder time deciding if that was a good thing or a bad thing!
Mrs. RW... But of course! We'd serve you up with a nice red sauce and a bottle of wine... you'd be delicious, I'm sure!
Sizzle... I'm scared to even think about the many ways that the scenario next door could end up. Covered in eggshells in the gutter would be one of the better outcomes. :-)
Iron Fist... Spokane is kind of the same way. It's interesting how the mentality is so different between a small-big city and a big-big city.
Claire... I'm pretty sure you're being served up to be bitten, I'm afraid.
Jake... I hear that. I feel like running down a particular light with my car every time I drive by it.
Colin... I think they are working on them or something. When I noticed that they were lit up, it's what made me think to finally take a photo. They usually aren't on in daylight hours.
Debora... Well, there's nothing worse than can happen with Dave2, so I think you're safe!
Chris... Yes. It's a real bitch when you are as incredibly famous as I am. You got the paparazzi and reporters and news cameras... why can't I just be left alone? =sob!=
Brent... But I notice that you didn't run your OWN personal slogan here... :-D
Kyra... The problem with "Have you ever had a bad time in Kyra" is that it invites a critique, and I don't think I could handle that. Mine is a simple yes or no question, so I'm pretty safe.
Penelope... Well, their house is hardly Narniariffic, but maybe. Looking at your slogan has me jealous. I think that's the one I would pick for myself.
HelloHaHaNarf... I love Pittsburgh. I really want to go back one of these days. I'm having a hard time deciding if these people were combative from the start... or if they grew old and cranky together over the years.
ChillyWilly... I'd hope for a shiny metal ass so I could tell everybody to bite it! Gotta love Bender.
Hilly Sue... Indeed. I still don't know exactly what it was all about. But the old man did something that the old woman didn't like with the eggshells, and she was making sure the entire neighborhood knew about it!
DutchBitch... I think I'd remember if you've had Dave inside... but then I forgot how I came to that conclusion, so I guess anything is possible.
I love it when you tell stories about your next door neighbors. That's hilarious.
You do get creeped out by weird things.
Posted by The Absurdist on April 18, 2008 | Reply
I know you are not supposed to put eggshells in the garbage disposal, but I can't remember why...
Posted by Mr. Fabulous on April 18, 2008 | Reply
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