Today was a bizarre kind of day, which is unusual in itself because all I did was go to work.
Of course, getting to work was a bit of a challenge because my car was iced over and the frost had somehow bonded to my windows. Scraping did nothing, so I had to wait until the defroster could take care of it. Weird that the first frost of the year was so serious.
After four hours of hard work, I needed to go to the post office to mail some T-shirts on my lunch break. Since it was a Saturday, the actual office wasn't open but there was a scary guy going through the mailing supply rack. He was kind of in a trance and kept repeating the same thing over and over again...
Scary Dude: Everybody's got a hungry heart. Everybody's got a hungry heart. Everybody. Everybody. Everybody's got a hungry heart. Everybody's got a hungry heart. Everybody. Everybody...
Thinking he might be stuck, I decided to help out in my best Springsteen impersonation...
Scary Dude: Everybody's got a hungry heart. Everybody's got a hungry heart. Everybody. Everybody. Everybody's got a hungry heart. Everybody's got a hungry heart. Everybody. Everybody...
Dave: ...LAY DOWN YOUR MONEY AND YOU PLAY YOUR PART. EVERYBODY'S GOT A HUH- HUH- HUNGRY HEAAAARRRT! ... WHOA OH OH OH OH OHHHHHHH!!
The guy just stared at me for a minute, then went back into his trance. I guess that makes me the crazy one.
After another five hours of slaving away on the job, I'd had enough and decided to go home. Along the way I noticed that gas was at $2.51 a gallon, and decided that was good enough to finally fill up my tank (probably a good thing since I've been running on empty for the past several days). While standing in the freezing cold and driving rain pumping my gas, a guy dressed in a Broncos jacket wandered up to me...
Bronco Dude: Hey man, you got any spare cash?
Dave: Uhhh... sorry, I haven't got any cash. I'm having to fill up on my card.
Bronco Dude: I really need it.
Dave: Um. Yeah... well, sorry I can't help out.
Bronco Dude: There's an ATM inside. Can you get some cash?
Dave: Errr... no.
Bronco Dude: Well that sucks man. That sucks!
Dave: Welcome to life on planet earth.
I guess that just goes to show you can never have too much crazy.
And to prove it, I'm going to go drink orange Kool-Aid and watch Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith!
Once, I was getting ready to start a 6-mile walk home because I didn't have enough for bus fare. I was at a pay phone when a guy came up and gave me a story and then asked for some money. I dug in and gave him all I had -- about 40 cents.
He looked at the change, then at me, then the change, then at me with a "are you kidding me" look in his eyes.
He finally left me alone.
Hmmm. Not my best story. Still, it needed to be told.
(Wait, on the walk home I was propositioned by another guy.)
Dave--you really need to know this: You absolutely CAN have too much crazy. Oh, yeah. I tell you this out of love. You may ask me how I know, but it might be best if you just trust me.
And if that "hungry heart" guy had knocked you on the head and taken my t-shirt, I'd be so aggravated. After I'd made sure you were OK, of course.
I CANNOT believe you are going to watch that heinous movie. Forward to part where Anakin gets burnt to a crisp and then gets put in his suit. That's the only good part. Fast forward through any part where Miss Whiney What's Her Face actually speaks.
I heartily approve of the orange kool-aid, though. Gonna drink from the penis?
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