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Tapped

Posted on Monday, December 19th, 2005

Dave!Oh happy day. Something must be up with my internet connection, AGAIN, because ecto is hanging any time I attempt to post to my blog, AGAIN. I spent hours last night trying to figure out what the problem was, but nothing seemed to work. And now tonight the problem seems to have mysteriously fixed itself, AGAIN. I wonder if it could be my Wireless Router dying or something?

Anyway, today was a very strange day. I got int--

GAH! ELIZABETH HURLEY IS ON TELEVISION! ELIZABETH HURLEY IS ON TELEVISION RIGHT NOW!!! Delicious! Hmmm... apparently she went to Elton John's wedding or something. Awww, that's not fair... they barely showed her!

Now where was I? Oh yes... blah blah blah... my day was strange... blah blah blah... somebody crashed into my car.

I got home from work early because there was some work I needed to finish on my laptop. So I pull into my spot and start unloading my car, when all of a sudden this idiot comes tearing into the ice-covered parking lot at full speed. For some reason, the dumbass thinks that his car is immune from sliding on ice, and actually seems surprised when he doesn't stop immediately after stepping on the brakes. Seeing him sliding towards me, I jump out of the way. He doesn't hit me, but slides square into the rear bumper on my car, then rolls down his window with a big smile on his face...

DUMBASS DRIVER: HA HA! Bet you thought I was going to hit you!
   
DAVE2: Yeah, well you DID hit my car!
   
DUMBASS DRIVER: Awww, it was just a tap! There's no damage.
   
DAVE2: If you're going to drive in bad weather, why don't you learn how first?
   
DUMBASS DRIVER: You're overreacting!
   
DAVE2: And you're a DUMBASS!

The smile disappears after that, and he revs his engine and peels out. He wasn't actually parking... just dropping somebody off... thankfully. But I love the fact that HE'S mad at ME because HE ran into MY CAR! He didn't even appologize. Classic!

I wonder what he would say if he ran over a little kid in a crosswalk? "IT'S JUST A TAP! GET UP AND WALK IT OFF! THERE'S NO DAMAGE!!"

Dumbass.

Like I said, it's been an interesting day.

CHAPTER 19: Bashing Through the Snow.
LEGO ADVENT CALENDAR TOY OF THE DAY: Remote Control Car.
   
While trying to track down the evil Lego Buzz, our hero runs into Lego Buzz Jr., who refuses to give up where his dad is at...
   
"TELL ME WHERE LEGO BUZZ IS AT, KID!" yells Lego Dave, his voice clipped.
"No way, you tool!" snaps Lego Buzz Jr. "I ain't telling you dick!"
"Are you talking to him on that walkie-talkie? inquires Lego Dave. "Let me talk to him!"
"Ha ha ha! This isn't a walkie talkie you dipshit!" Lego Buzz Jr. says with a sneer. "It's for my remote control car!"
   
Clutching the remote, Lego Buzz Jr. presses some buttons and a small car goes zooming by. It circles a few times, then comes to a stop right in front of Lego Dave.
   
"Wow, that's pretty cool!" exclaims Lego Dave.
"Yeah, I know, freak-bag!" Lego Buzz Jr. says as he rolls his eyes.
"I wonder how cool it will be when I smash it to pieces with my foot!" taunts Lego Dave. "Now why don't you tell me where Lego Buzz is before you have a remote-control pile of junk!"
"NNNOOOOOOOOO!" cries Lego Buzz Jr.! "That's mine! MINE! MINE! MINE!"
Lego Holiday Nineteen
"You better tell me!!" shouts Lego Dave. "Or I'm busting it up!"
"Okay! Okay!" whines Junior. "He went to pawn some jewelry at the shop down on Main Street. NOW GIVE ME MY CAR YOU BASTARD!"
"Sure thing." says Lego Dave. "But I'm afraid that I'm going to need to borrow something from you before I go."
   
His eyes ablaze, Lego Dave removes the hand-axe from his belt and slowly walks towards Lego Buzz Junior...
   
Has Lego Dave finally fallen off the deep end?
   
FIND OUT TOMORROW WHEN DAVE'S "A VERY LEGO HOLIDAY TALE" CONTINUES!


Categories: DaveLife 2005, LEGOClick To It: Permalink
   

Comments

  1. cougfan says:

    He should chop of buzz jrs arm, and then beat buzz to death with it.

  2. Kevin says:

    And, should he not find Lego Buzz right away, Lego Dave can tear the wheels and axles off the R/C car and use them to pump up his Lego biceps. Don’t they look an awful lot like dumbbells (and not the kind that plow into parked cars in an icy parking lot)?

    Did you at least get his license plate to report him for hit & run?

  3. Michelle says:

    Yeah apparently it was Elton John and his man’s joint Stag night, where they had topless waiters! Hehehe…

  4. delmer says:

    Years ago a friend was in Philly. A woman sideswiped her car. My friend confronted her saying, “You hit my car.”

    “I didn’t hit it,” came the reply, “I rubbed it.”

    It was a slow sideswipe — but still, hitting, rubbing, it still takes the paint off.

    People are … well, you know …

  5. Pauly D says:

    I once ran over a throng of cub scouts in an icy crosswalk and people got all up in my face because of it. For those years I was behind bars, I just never got it.

    See? That was my own Lego story except there were no Legos but real people and instead of fake photoshop blood, there was real blood and, yeah… That’s all.

  6. jodi says:

    Can’t be ecto…. ecto is lovely and wonderful and makes blogging twice as fun.

    I’d blame the weather. I hear it’s cold and icy and freezing on your side of the state. My side’s grey. As per usual.

  7. sandra says:

    When I was 19 and on my way to get drunk in Windsor — as was my job as a Detroit area teenager — a man backed into me while I was waiting in the customs line. He got out of the car and screamed (full volume), “I wish you’d honked or something!” To which I responded, “I wish you hadn’t f-ing hit me!”

    Moral of the story: many, MANY people are idiotic.

  8. Dave2 says:

    Cougfan: Assuming something totally strange doesn’t pop out of the Lego Advent Calendar tonight… you’re part-right!

    Kevin: There wasn’t any damage, or else I would have called in a hit-and-run… right after I broke my foot off in his ass! As for dumbbells, I avoid working out like the plague, so I don’t know WHAT they look like! 🙂

    Michelle: Please tell me that Elizabeth Hurley wasn’t one of the topless waiters… I think I would have to shoot myself! Well, shoot myself with a rubber band or something… nothing that would hurt too much.

    Delmer: I would have “rubbed” my car over her head! I don’t get why people think that they don’t do any damage just because the car isn’t totaled.

    Pauly: If you ran over cub scouts while wearing a thong, I’m afraid that the reason you were put into prison was not the reason you THOUGHT you were put into prison! What? What was that? Ohhhh… you said thRong… ah, then you were in a CAR. Well never mind then. Yes, you were robbed. Prison time totally shouldn’t be required for running over cub scouts.

    Jodi: ecto totally rules! Adriaan mentioned in an email that he was working on a new version, so heaven only knows what cool stuff is in store for us!

    Sandra: So… what you’re saying is that the guy felt it is OUR job to stop people from running into us? Oh yes. That makes perfect sense then. Heaven forbid somebody should actually have to pay attention when behind the wheel. Bleh. You are so right. TOO many people are idiotic!

  9. kilax says:

    What an ASS (the driver)!!! I am happy you are ok though.

    A drunk driver rear-ended me on Halloween and ruined my bumper. He tried to bribe with cash, but I called the cops. He fled the scene and the cops didn’t even try to find him… so who is the real ass – the driver or the cops? (Or me for not taking the money?)

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