It would be the chocolate-mint Oreos, so no help there. Those are even worse, containing even more hydrogenated fats the better to kill you with.

And if Elizabeth Hurley ever does show up on your doorstep, please do not, um...soil yourself. It's really not the impression you're going for. You wanna be all, "Oh, hey. I was wondering when you'd get here. Shall we go for some Cheesy Fiesta Potatoes and alcoholic concoctions involving Red Bull now?"

And if you can tell me how to get my child to sleep in the next 5 minutes, and it WORKS, I will give you one million dollars. Because it's 3:00AM and I'm is sleepy.

Posted by Belinda on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Oreos are sadly pretty rare over here - only a few stockists sell them and they're expensive since they have to be imported. Hari and I got some from Selfridges in Manchester a few weeks ago and they were heavenly.

Can't remember how much we paid but it was something like £2 ($3.50 USD) for one packet of cookies - not exactly good value. They also had Oreo Cereal at £7, or $12. But then Selfridges' usual clientele wouldn't balk at that, I suppose.

Posted by Neil T. on March 21, 2006 | Reply

two words man, nutter butter. enough said

Posted by katelyn on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Why does every "Seal of Approval" post cause my bank account to deplete and my free time to disappear?

GOLDEN OREOS? Good god, man -- who cares about ozone depletion when something like this is in stores?

Posted by Pauly D on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Hmmmm... golden oreos look like round custard creams to me (popular rectangular british biscuit - best dunked in tea). Still, I'd be willing to give them a try, so why don't you ship some over to me, and in return I will send you some coke with lime, which we seem to have in abundance over here. I wonder if Liz would eat an oreo? It's doubtful, but I guess thats why she looks like that and I don't!

Posted by serap on March 21, 2006 | Reply

"Steak Sauce"? Has someone been watching How I Met Your Mother?

Golden Oreos... will have to try. As for the "how can three bags in two weeks possibly be good for me" crap... you're 6'1" (I would guess, if not an inch taller) and you weigh about a buck sixty-five... shut up and eat your damn Oreos.

Posted by Kevin on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Your Justice League excitement is giving me flashbacks to when I was a kid jumping off my bed in my Wonder Woman underwear.

As for a cookie suggestion -- Tagalongs. They're filled with a cookie center covered in peanut buttery goodness and coated in smooth milk chocolate. I can eat a whole box in one sitting. Go shake down a Girl Scout and try some.

Posted by Rabbit on March 21, 2006 | Reply

I like the refrigerated cookie dough, like the Nestle Sugar cookies. They aren't hard to fix, make me feel the slightest bit domestic even though a monkey could do it and warm cookies sure are good. If you want to get your Martha Stewart vibe on, they even have the kind you can decorate. But plain sugar cookies are good for me.

Posted by Brittopia on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Wow.

And, this post shows juuuust how many Golden Oreo's you've eaten this morning. :)

Posted by adena on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Just curious - are you one of those genetically lucky people who don't have to worry about their cholesterol, or one of those "don't wanna know" types?

I'm not one of the lucky ones and am chained to low-fat hell forever. Either that or poop-inducing pills, which I prefer not.

Posted by Jeff on March 21, 2006 | Reply

I just bought the Justice Leaugue DVD's for my brother and he hasn't stopped watching them since he unwrapped them. High quality.

Posted by Bre on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Wait until you try the Golden Oreo shake (recipe is at the kraftfoods website).

0g Trans Fat,Cholesterol Free (before the ice cream).

Posted by Chanakin on March 21, 2006 | Reply

First of all, Justice League -- I'm on it.

Second of all, Golden Oreos -- I'M ON IT!!!!!!!!!

Please tell me they don't put lard in their filling anymore. I went to Nabisco Web site and looked up the Golden Oreos nutritional value, but since I don't have a master's degree in chemical engineering, I'm not sure what the hell it is I'm reading. Plus, there's always those "none of your business" ingredients that the companies somehow get around telling you about (like how McDonald's blanches their fries in lard at the factory).

I have no problem with chemicals that kill, only with ingredients that have been killed (you dig), so if there's no lard, then these babies are mine!!!

Golden Oreos Ingredients: ENRICHED FLOUR (WHEAT FLOUR, NIACIN, REDUCED IRON, THIAMINE MONONITRATE {VITAMIN B1}, RIBOFLAVIN {VITAMIN B2}, FOLIC ACID), SUGAR, PALM OIL, HIGH OLEIC CANOLA OIL, DEXTROSE, HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP, CORNSTARCH, SALT, BAKING SODA, WHEAT STARCH, NATURAL AND ARTIFICIAL FLAVOR, SOY LECITHIN (EMULSIFIER).

Please, I have to replace the void in my life since giving up Sunny Doodles.

Posted by Eve on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Speaking of Cartoons...and nerdy stuff. :)

One of our friends is a HUGE Star Wars geek. HUGE. He has all the toys, and everything. He's addicted to the Clone Wars Cartoon (on DVD). He pretty much takes it everywhere w/ him, and pops it into people's dvd players....so, I think we've all seen it about 20 million times.

Anyhow, it's not half bad. Have you seen it yet. (I actually think there are 2 out on DVD now.)

Posted by adena on March 21, 2006 | Reply

is it just me or does your title "steak sauce" have nothing to do with this entire post? if so, i dig it. ;)

i did not know there were golden oreos! i am so screwed because of course now i have to go get some.

Posted by ms. sizzle on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Well, I bet you never had Zlate oplatky made by Opavia, so that'd be my recommendation ;)

Posted by Wejn on March 21, 2006 | Reply

The entire Justice League series is brilliant! Any comic book lovin' geek will especially enjoy and appreciate the (based on) Alan Moore (For The Man Who Has Everything) and Warren Ellis episodes, not to mention the creators are the same as The Batman Animated, which RULE. Justice League Unlimited is also pretty good but has recently been canceled. Why they give the best cartoons the weirdest time slots I'll never understand. Btw...Yessssss Nutter Butters are the way

Posted by Tart on March 21, 2006 | Reply

two words, cookie wise: Jaffa Cakes.

I am in their thrall.

Posted by karla on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Why do I now think of Elizabeth Hurley every time I eat a Golden Oreo?

Posted by Neil on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Justice League! Justice League! Talk about creamin' the jeans!!!! (I'm such a NERD!)

Oh! And speaking of inappropriate expressions... guess who's drinking Coke w/Lime? That's right! Me, bitches!!!

Posted by Naomi on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Liz Hurley's eyes in those photos...
It's as if she saying:

"ARE THOSE GOLDEN OREOS?? DAVE, HOW COULD YOU??? I CAN'T EAT COOKIES!! THEY GO STRAIGHT TO MY HIPS!! GET BEHIND ME, SATAN!!"

Posted by adena on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Thank god Project Catwalk is over. I was starting to get a crush on her because she IS the most beautiful woman on the planet.

Posted by Kathleen on March 21, 2006 | Reply

I like the wonder woman pic, the rounded calculating eyes. I even know what she is thinking; "How fast do I have to be to give this bozo the slapping he deserves? Drape your arm over me like I'm your favourite armchair will you. Taste my angry lasso!"

Posted by Elizabeth McClung on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Dave,

I think I'm also going to have to break down and buy the Justice League DVDs. My cookie suggetion: Keebler Soft Batch Chocolate Chip. Not very original, but damn they're tasty. They also make oatmeal raisin, if you don't like the chocolate chip.

Posted by Mark on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Oreos are my favorite processed cookie, which is why the advent of Golden Oreos is both thrilling and distressing. Thrilling because there are NEW OREOS TO EAT. Distressing because...well, for the same reason. Damn/thank you, Dave!

Posted by sandra on March 21, 2006 | Reply

Golden Oreos ROCK! I don't know if you have Big Lots or Odd Lots stores in the great Northwest, but I found the ol' Golden Oreos there for $1.99, which is amazing for Oreos.

I wish I could recommend another yummy cookie, but I think those were the last cookies I tried!

Posted by Tracy on March 21, 2006 | Reply

I love the Uh Oh Oreos, which are the golden cookie on the outside, and the most lucious chocolate cream inside. It's not the same cream as the other chocolate cream Oreos, it's totally different and, imo, to die for. I can't buy a package because I'll eat the whole thing. (Like now, where I'm eating oatmeal raisin cookie dough...why bake them?)

Oreos haven't had lard in them in years. They've been Kosher for at least the last 10 years or so, and that was the death knell for Hydrox, which I always liked better than Oreos. But they're long gone...

Posted by margalit on March 21, 2006 | Reply

yep, i'm never, ever going to give up junk food for lent ever again.

Posted by rach on March 21, 2006 | Reply

I bought some new oreos. Thanks, Dave. Thanks alot. After the first one I said "The originals are much better" and when the bag was gone, I'd been completely converted.

Posted by nic on March 24, 2006 | Reply