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Forty

Posted on March 24, 2006

Dave!Today I am forty years old.

That's a lot of years. Where did it all go?

Still, I can't complain. I've done a lot of things in my life, am fortunate to have seen a bit of the world, am relatively healthy, and have terrific friends and family to get me through the day. I guess that makes me a lucky guy (if I believed in luck, which I don't).

But forty... wow. A pity that I still act like a 12-year-old, but everybody has their issues.

Anyway, I guess I'm ready to die now.

Not that I want to die, I'm just saying... if it happens, I'm okay with it.

And if I get to choose how I'm going to die, I think it would go something like this...

Birthday 2006

Birthday 2006

Birthday 2006

Birthday 2006

Zombie Dave

Zombie Dave

   

The good news is that being dead gives me a terrific new DaveToon to draw...

Zombie Dave

And just for the record, Bad Monkey did not die from a marathon love-making session with Elizabeth Hurley. He died from an overdose of Coke with Lime.

Uhhhh... yeah.

Happy birthday to me.

   
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Comments

A very Happy birthday to you!!!!

Posted by Göran on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

yeah, so that's a bottle of diet coke under the white sheet, right?

happy birthday, man.

Posted by rach on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! This is the weirdest sentiment I think I've ever expressed, but my wish for you is that your death go exactly as you've described...or that you just live long enough, and get doddery enough, to believe it did. You are just adored by so many--you are truly blessed. Pick closing scene from either "Pride of the Yankees" or "It's A Wonderful Life" and insert speech about being the "luckiest man" or the "richest man" in the world HERE.

Could I ask, just in case the two of you don't go at the same time, that you leave Bad Monkey to me? I will take care of him, and monitor his Coke with Lime intake. I think he'd get on famously with the Ninja Poodles.

And I feel I must point out how amazing and civic-minded it is that you, even after being zombified, come back from the dead, but stop to kill Jared BEFORE resuming sexathon with Liz! Whatta guy, dead or alive!

Really. Happy Happy, Guy.

Posted by Belinda on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Hey, we share a birthday! Just happened upon your site through Belinda. Gonna check it out and see what you got.

Posted by digibrill on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Havent you heard that life begins at 40??

Posted by SANDRA on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

You don't look a day over 39!

Happy Birthday, Mr Daveident, Happy Birthday to youuuuuuuuu.

Posted by Ben on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday, big guy.

Death by Liz Hurley, now that's a good way to go.
I was once told that how we imagine we'll die is most likely how we will..
It sounds strangely wrong but may your fantasy comes true in time to come.

Posted by i8toomuch on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday.

I hope if death comes to you that way, it won't take another 40 years... yack....

:)

Frank

Posted by Frank Mantek on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday Dave!
Zombie sex is more than a little disturbing but I suppose there are worse things to happen to you after you die. Speaking of disturbing, is it just me or is Liz Hurley's face really messed up in that first picture? There's something weird about her mouth...
Anyway, hope you get everything you wanted (minus the death)

Posted by ash on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Belinda sent me over. She's right. You are a funny fellow. I enjoy acting like a 12 year old too.

I always tell people I'm ready to die, too. Actually, what I tell them is I'm ready to go home to Jesus (except I say it in a TV preacher voice, so it's more like JEEE-sssssssssssssuuusssssss!)

And Elizabeth Hurley WOULD be a nice way to go, but I still prefer going down in a hail of gunfire.

It's inevitable.

Posted by Mr. Fabulous on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy birthday!

Posted by ssp on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

happy birthday dave

*hugs* from down under :):):):)

Posted by kazza on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAVE! I hope you have a great weekend and you celebrate well. Hey, you should have a Malibu and Coke with Lime!

Posted by Nicole on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy b-day! So...uhhh...what's zombie sex like, exactly?

Posted by Cavan on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday Dave!

Posted by D-S on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Felicitations on your natal anniversary, Dave2!

My wish for you is that the second trimester of your life be twice as outrageous as the first. In a good way, of course!

P.S. This cartoon sequence is even better than Lego Dave. Zombies totally RULE.

Posted by SJ on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday Dave, good luck with the Liz Hurley Scenario. You might want to go back and run your zombie face through the 'My Heritage' celebrity lookalikes, so that you can figure out if they're getting ready to shoot you next. Especially if you plan to spend any time at the mall. I'm just saying.
BTW, I get to go through this whole 40 y/o introspection in 7 months and 11 days...ACK!

Posted by robin on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Big honkin' happy birthday to you, Dave!!! Forty!?!?! Dang, you're an old fart.

I worry about what SJ said... if this is the start of the second trimester of your life, are you prepared to live to 120? That's one old monkey.

Is there any particular reason that Zombie Dave and Monkey slightly resemble and even make the same utterances as Bill the Cat? Hairballs as well?

Posted by Kevin on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Okay, Room 324 is your birthday. But I'm trying to figure out why, after forty years of training, you only lasted 5 hours and 25 minutes with Liz? Maybe this was a job for "The Lone Dick" Dave toon.
Have a Great Birthday!!!

Posted by Wade on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

HAPPY BIG FOUR-OH!

Don't let mid-life crisis get you down! :P

Posted by Firda on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday! But seriously, I though you were in your late twenties or something...

Posted by Neil T. on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday! :) Ya legend

Posted by Anthony on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday!

Lordy lordy, look who's... 12?

I loved turning 40 and have been doing more new things than ever before. Enjoy!!!

Posted by Jeff on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday!!!

I suggest you celebrate by buying tix to BlogHer so you can get fondled by hundreds of blogger women. I bet most of them would let you call 'em Elizabeth.

Posted by Chase on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy birthdy Dave! I'm a daily lurker, but wanted to pop in for birthday greetings.

Today is also my second sons' birthday. He's 23. I had him when I was 12. ;)

Have a great year.

-RG

(PS- I, too, live in the Seattle 'area')

Posted by RisibleGirl on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy bday!! Although, I'm not entirely sure that it's zombie sex....I more think you're actually devouring her.

I mean, obsessed and all...once you're a zombie, nothing would make you happier than a Liz Buffet.
(and I guess that means you're not following a vegetarian lifestyle in the afterlife...)

Posted by adena on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

I have a great idea! Let's get another year OLDER!

You first.

Happy Birthday, Dave.

Posted by nic on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

"Happy Birthday" Dave....but I seem to remember it was your 40th last year...what's UP with that?
(and I'm not talking about your bed sheet either)

Posted by Harold on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy B-Day

Thanks for all the laughs - especially today's

Posted by Chanankin on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Hope you have a very happy birthday! Remember that 40 is the new 25.

Posted by Bonnie on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DUDE!!!

Today is my Mom's birthday, too!

Some other happenings today in history:
- 1989 Exxon Valdez oil spill
- U.S. appeals court rules novel Lady Chatterly's Lover not obscene in 1960
- Nineth planet Pluto was named in 1930
- Mormon Joseph Smith beaten, tarred, and feathered in Ohio in 1832

Listen, if you're what it's like to be 40, then I'm not scared of aging anymore. Not only are you aging really well, Zombie Dave is decomposing nicely.

Have an awesome birthday filled with lots of Coke with Lime, Golden Oreos, and Liz Hurley wood (and not so much tar and feathering).

Posted by Eve on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday Dave!

May your wish of dieing atop Liz come true! (not that I want you dead)

Zombie Dave IS cool though...so.....

Posted by Patti on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy birthday, Dave!

May the next 40 bring you all the Liz-loving, lime-Coke-drinking, less-annoying-people dealing, and bad-monkey-adventure-having that you well deserve.

Enjoy your day!

Posted by Silvertongue on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Hey, a haaaaaapppy BIRTHDAAAAY!!!!

But...40!? You wish - not a year older than 24... :)

Posted by Patrick on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy birthday and good to know that someone with such deep rooted addictions such as you can get a legal outlet through the blog - oh wait, I think Zombie sex is outlawed in Alabama and the District of Columbia - so stay legal and stay safe!

Posted by Elizabeth McClung on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday!

Posted by Shannon on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday!

Posted by ms. sizzle on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Damn Dave, I would have never guessed that you were 40. I was thinking you were pushing around the mid 30's.

Well I hope you have a great birthday!

Posted by Anonymous on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

I can think of much worse ways to go. Happy birtday.

Posted by Bryan on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy birthday, Dave! Me and Liz have been rejoicing all week with excitement that the ever-fabulous you was born. I'm trying to get her to promise that she'll serve you Coke with lime after you guys do your thing...I'll keep you posted. All or nothing, right?!

Posted by sandra on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday Dave! I just turned 29 last week and I feel like an old man, I can't imagine 40. Just kidding.

Wow, Little Dave is hung like a moose, should we really still refer to him as Little Dave?

Posted by Brandon on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

happy birthday dave.
...loved the davetoons

Posted by barrett doke on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday Dave ;-) You always amaze me with ur imaginations ;-)

Posted by Chandre Gowda on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

happy birthday dave!

Posted by trixie on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday!!!

:) :) :)

Posted by lizriz on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy birthday!!

Posted by Betta on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday Dave! :D

Posted by Chris on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday! 40 is the new 20 or at least that's what US Weekly told me and they never lie! Great post, I had no idea Liz was a Necropheliac. Good to know, good to know...

Posted by Deb_LA on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Liked the cartoon (noticed the room number).

Have a Happy Birthday!

Posted by Gary LaPointe on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy B-Day Ace. So Liz would do a zombie but draws the like with monkeys? :/

Posted by Stingray on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Bon anniversaire mon ami!

Posted by Brad on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy birthday, Dave (and Dave2)

This was the funniest series you've drawn yet. Totally hilarious. I can't wait till you turn 50 to see what comes up then!

Send this to elizabeth hurley...please!

Posted by margalit on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy birthday!

I'll use what power I have and see if I can't get that Elizabeth Hurley thing to happen.

Posted by timothy on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday dude.

Posted by Pauly D on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy birthday!

Posted by reluctant housewife on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Normally I don't wish people "happy birthday"s. I don't say "bless you" either.

Today, I will make the exception...Bless You and Happy Birthday. May all your Jagerbomb dreams come true.

Posted by Craig S on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

A thousand returns on the day. I'm proud to wear your shirt. If ever I get it. :-)

Best to you and yours always.

Posted by RW on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Dave,

Happy birthday! Someone buy the birthday boy a bourbon, a scotch, and a beer. And buy one of each for yourself.

Posted by Mark on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday Dave

Posted by Art on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Very funny! Happy 40th! Better than being 50!

Posted by Dan on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happiest of Birthdays!!! -=)

Posted by alice on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

I thought you were 38?! I guess we're not twins after all.

Posted by Phil on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

So what did Elizabeth say when Zombie Dave come through the door? Did she like her Dave dead or alive?

Posted by amamgets on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

A very happy birthday, Dave! Hope you'll go round the world another couple of times before you die.

Posted by Marc on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy, happy day!

Posted by Tracy on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

A very Happy Birthday to you! Drinks all around.

Posted by Annette on March 24, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday to you!
You look like Bad Monkey,
And Liz Hurley loves you!

Posted by Mooselet on March 25, 2006 | Reply

   

Being married with three kids and living in that blissful state of motherhood has NOT deterred me from wanting to die in that same way. I mean, it's your fantasy and all, but seriously, I'd go out like that.

Happy Birthday.

Posted by Mocha on March 25, 2006 | Reply

   

I hope you had a good birthday. I know that his personal life is in disarray in the tabloids, but just feel comforted to know that Mr. Hasselhoff married one of his former brides on your birthday. The connection is real.

Posted by Brittopia on March 25, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy Birthday, Dave. Welcome to 40. It's not a bad place, but it's an interesting place. Can't wait to see what 45 brings... I've got a little more than 2 years before I find out.

BTW, your cartoons today remind me of a South Park episode called Pink Eye, where Kenny ends up eating people's brains.

Of course, yours is better since Kenny never got to bang Elizabeth Hurley.

Posted by ChillyWilly on March 25, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy birthday Dave! I can't believe Zombie Dave is eating meat now! But I heard that if you get him w/ the fat free ranch dressing, Jared only has 7 grams of fat.

May your every Hurley wish come true!

Posted by jenny on March 25, 2006 | Reply

   

This post was so laugh-out-loud funny (especially the ROWRRRR slide) I had to read it a few times. Sometimes you read some things and can't stop laughing. Life is truly wonderful when you feel that way.

Until you die, that is. But death is truly wonderful when you die *your* way.

If you send me your birth time and place, I can have my wife do up a chart for you. She's studying to be a professional astrologist. I know you said in your FAQ that you don't believe in astrology but astrology is truly wonderful when you , um, well the analogy has lost it's charm.

How about this - you send me the info, and she'll do up a chart privately and then you can let her know how "accurate" it is. 1) she doesn't even know you exist (she's not an online kind of person too much), so she wouldn't be cheating and 2) your feedback would help her refine her skills. If you really need more incentive, I'll throw in a bag of golden oreos and a case of coke with lime. No kidding.

I would throw in Liz, but frankly last time we were together *I* lost the bet, and *she's* supposed to find *me* someone who fantasizes about me for me to have a 28 Days Later-style hotel rendenvous with.

Tough luck dude. And send me the info.

Posted by Wayne Hall on March 25, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy (ever so slightly belated) Birthday Dave! I hope the festivities haven't left you too hungover ;) If your ever in the neighborhood pop in my bar, free Jagerbomb(s) for the Birthday boy.

Cheers to you~

Posted by Kimberly on March 25, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy birthday.

Posted by marie b. on March 25, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy belated, Dave!

Posted by Charred on March 26, 2006 | Reply

   

Sorry I am late........

Haapy Birthday!!!

Posted by Sayuri on March 26, 2006 | Reply

   

Hurley Birthday, Dave. Late, but what do you expect from Hurley Birthday wishes?

Posted by Jennifer on March 26, 2006 | Reply

   

Dave,

I just read this post today. Happy belated B-Day and like Neil I didn't think you were 40. Congrats on looking so young :)

Cheers.

Posted by Troy on March 26, 2006 | Reply

   

Wow, you're so old now! =D Happy belated birthday!

Posted by Clever on March 26, 2006 | Reply

   

Dave,

I'm late to the well wishing, but Happy Birthday.

I also lack the desire to read through 79 other comments ... perhaps one of the other older-than-you farts has mentioned that at his/her advanced age he/she still acts like a 12-year old, so you're not alone. (If someone else hasn't pointed it out, please accept this as that pointing.)

I know I'm constantly amazed my the immature, oddball thoughts I have and things I do. My dad always seemed so mature. Am I to beleive that when he was at the grocery store he was thinking things like, "I wonder how many grapes I could get in my mouth." (I think at least 25, a lot more if I mush them up.)

Posted by delmer on March 27, 2006 | Reply

   

I just saw this segment on today's Extra tv show with Liz Hurley and thought of you:

How Elizabeth Hurley Stays Fabulous at 40

Posted by Eve on March 27, 2006 | Reply

   

Happy birthday! We're still in birthday week mode, right?

Posted by claire on March 28, 2006 | Reply

   

   

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